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helped us to become reasonably certain that everyone was talking about the same experience.” Despite the different ways each participant actually had sex, at the very peaks of the experience, everyone was feeling the same kinds of things: total absorption in the moment, deep connection with their partner, and openness and a willingness to take a few emotional risks. “One of the first surprising findings,” write the study authors, “was the … uncanny similarity in descriptions. Through a series of interviews, researchers began to build up a picture of what “the best sex ever” looks, feels and sounds like. To answer some of these questions, the researchers recruited people from around the world across the age, gender and sexuality spectrum – who self-reported having had, at some point in their lives, truly mindblowing sex. What did it feel like? Who was having it? And what made it so great?
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In a recent study, Magnificent Sex, psychologist and sex therapist Dr Peggy J Kleinplatz and her colleagues at Ottawa University in Canada realised that, while whole library sections were dedicated to bad sex (and how to make it better), there was almost no literature dedicated to great sex.
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In fact, according to the latest research, erotic intimacy is more a state of mind than a physical act.
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F ar from what films and TV shows might tell us, truly magnificent sex has very little to do with daring feats of seduction or screaming orgasms.